Sunday, July 26, 2009

Givun dah Ansirz

Hay thar itz dah Bugg Gooroo.

Yoo askz sum crazeee hard qwestshuns an I thinkz hard to ansirz dem!

Withowt furthr adoo, hur dey arr!

Lily and Benson ask, "Can you see me? Those glasses are neat!"

Lily an Benny yes I can seez wit mah spektaklez. Yoo shud get sum! Dey arr all dah rage.

Asta asks, "Can you pleez tell me why I have a polka dotted tummie? Am I a dalmation in disguise? Thank you fow youw considewation."

Astah dat iz so neet! Spotz arr dah sine of delishussniss. Lyke peparohnee on dah peetza, yoo is a favarit of menny!

Pumpkin asks, "When will I finally land an Oscar winning role and knock Brangelina off the cover of People?"

Hmm dat iz a hard won, Pummkeeen. Kan yoo adopp sum puppehz? Or iz der a Brad Pittbull in yoor nayburhood dat yoo culd be seenz wit? Anguleena wasunt populur untell she wuz seen wit hur Pittbull. Pee-s I will bee yoor biggust fan wen ur gettun dah Oscur.

Sequoia and Petunia ask, "My Mothers paints her nails. It sure does smells bad but I was wonderings if we can have painted nails too. Hers looks so fancy when shes done? Have you evers painted yours paw nails befores?"

Mah daddeh wont let mah mommah paintz mah nails. Dey can be vereh vereh pretteh if you yoose dah doggeh nail polush. Yoo shud sweet talkz yoor mommeh into doin yur nailz!

Coco asks, "My mother said she would get me a birthday present in advance. She made plans with a friend to take me to the mall with her once I get my present. Dad says he will never walk with her and me 'riding' that thing. Dear Gooroo, I am dying to know what my present will be. Can you envision it?"

Hai best budd Coco! I haz gud newz fur yoo. Yoor presunt iz an elefunt. You will ridez it lyke dah royalty in Indeea. I bet yoor daddeh iz embarussed becuz yoo arr such royulty.

Clementine asks, "Bugg, the mommy and papi are putting me in agility classes. they are doing this because for some reason, they are under the impression that I need to 'burn off my energy in more constructive ways'.....however, I think it's just going to make me even more agile in my house-couch-bed-winston-romping abilities. What do you think? Will I be so worn out afterwards, I won't be able to move, or will it be like the pug matrix when I come back?"

Clemmeh, yoo will needz to harnuss yoor agiluty chee. Fokus an yoo can be lyke dah matrex. Get distractud by foodabuls an yoo will be worn owt. Fokus mah frend an yoo will be unstopabul!!!!

Winston sez, "Dearest honorable respectable Bugg, I would like to honor you with a gift. I will be shipping Ms. Clementine Churchill to you via priority mail. Please use her at your discretion, although I personally think she is most suited for hard pugual labor. There will be no return address, but you'll know it's from me."

Uh... Winstun? No tankz. Nuthin agenst Clemmeh but I haz mah handz full with mah Sofeee.

Ruby Bleu asks, "My Mom has this big green box with wheels that she keeps in the closet. Well, it came out today and she started putting her clothes in it, but none of my things. Do you know what it could mean???"

Rubeh, gud newz!!! Dat meenz yoor mommeh is puttun stuff in dah box to takez to dah storr to sellz hur stuf fur moneh to buyz YOO morr stuf!!!! Congradyoolashuns!

Hank & Molly's Mom asks, "Here's the deal. Today, Molly O'Mally ran away from home! Before I could stop her, she shot out the front door like a cannon. Her daddy found her in the neighbor's shed. It nearly gave me a stroke as she crossed the street without even looking for oncoming traffic! Why would she do such a thing?? Doesn't she like living with us? Would she rather live in a smelly, dusty shed? I really need your input on this."

Hank n Molleh's Mommeh, it iz won of too thingz. 1- Hank may or may not haz told hur dat der wuz unlimuhted PBR in dah shed. 2- Molleh may or may not haz a ron-day-voo partnur in dah shed. I will let yoo uze yoor imaginashun.

Emmitt asks, "i have always had this question... why don't they make doggy doors leading into the fridge so i can grab a snack whenever i want? my doggy door only leads outside of the house... the farthest possible place from the fridge. makes no sense to me!"

Emmut, yoo iz lookun at dis all rong! Der are manny manny tastee thingz outsyde. Try dah poopz uf othur anamuls, tastee pynekonez, an evun dirt! Yoo will forgetz dah frige in no tyme!

Brutus asks, "Bugg, why doesn't mom take me everywhere with her? She knows I love to ride in the car and hang with her all the time?"

Brootuss, yoor mommeh wud if she cud so considur why she mite not. Do you fartz all deh tyme? Or maybeh yoo is soo cuute dat yoo wud be distractun. Maybeh yoo shud mayke hur get a puggeh carriur?

Tankz all fur anuthur grate installmunt of dah Gooroo!


Heather and Pumpkin said...

Thanks Dixie - I will go find a Brad Pittbull right now!


Sequoia & Petunia said...

Thanks for the answers Bugg! We loved them all!

Hank said...

Bugg Gooroo! You are a genius!

Of course Hank would tell her there was PBR in the shed. He's always looking for ways to get rid of her.

Thanks a million!

BRUTUS said...

Wow - what a post Gooroo - you must be exhausted after that. And your poor typist - think she needs a raise (or at least a cookie) after transcribing all that!!


Nevis said...

Love dah Gooroo!!! LOL!!!

Anonymous said...

Bugg Guru you are so wise and smart and very beautiful in your spectacles. :)

Salinger The Pug said...

We LOVE Da Bugg Gooroo!

Perhaps she could become a weekly or monthly fixture?

WHY aren't the girls allowed to have their nails painted? Aunt Laura was looking forward to a girly spa day next weekend! ;-)

Joe Stains said...

Dang! Mom has been so busy I missed the question submission!! :( You give all the good answers.

Melissa and Emmitt said...

ahhhh! thank you guru bugg. you are a genius!

i am going outside now to hunt for snacks!


Rachel said...

Bugg, Winston says, "too late, sucka!!" you will have to learn to make Sophie and Clementine works together for the gooroo.
Thanks for the answers!

Rosie said...

Excellent - loved it!